A negative thought changes the way I breathe,
My breathing isn’t feeling normal,
I can’t seem to breathe,
I’m thinking I’m not normal,
Thinking I’m not normal is making it even harder to breathe.
Worries are appearing,
Worries have turned into stress,
Fear is appearing,
Fear appeared because of the symptoms related to stress,
It was all the anxiety that couldn’t stop the panic from appearing.
The nausea is now increasing,
My body is shaking,
I’m curled up in a ball as the panic keeps increasing,
I’m feeling desperate for a drug that would take away the fear that is causing the shaking,
Yet my thoughts are taking over and the symptoms keep increasing.
My heart is racing,
My body is sweating,
I can’t stop the racing,
I’m removing my clothes to stop the shaking,
Nothing is stopping the symptoms including the racing.
I run to the restroom wondering if it’s going to come up or down,
I want to die because the panic is too much to handle,
I’m doing my best to keep everything down,
I’m repeating over and “Oh God” as I do my best to handle,
Yet somehow it all stays down.
The tears that had fallen because of fear are now tears of relief,
The symptoms are going away one by one,
I’m so tired even though I reached relief,
For today I won,
Somehow I’ll keep fighting and end up reaching relief.
Those were the thoughts of my past,
It’s truly amazing that I survived,
I was alone in the past,
Even alone I survived,
Now I’m giving thanks that I didn’t die because of the past.